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March 29, 2011 / The Ghost

The English Patient

Okay guys, it’s about a patient. And yes, he’s English. But why isn’t anyone there to perform euthanasia? The poor guy is suffering from his wounds and on top of that, he has no television to watch or video games to play. Is it so much to ask??

I’m sorry but I thought this could’ve been a lot better. The movie rambles on about how much he is suffering in his bed and his diary and other crap. Just show us more explosions and blue stuff, come on! And the worst part of all this? Count László de Almásy loses his love, gets mutilated, dies and turns into Voldemort fifteen years later in the movies! It’s Darth Vader all over again! 😦

My alternate ending:

Count László de Almásy ties TNT all over his body, looks into the camera, says “Hasta La Vista Baby” and blows himself up with the entire building. And then a hurricane comes and swoops away whatever is left and sucks the camera in as well. So awesome.

“The English Patient” on IMDB. Rate: 1/10. No special effects, and you know how much I hate that!!


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