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March 31, 2011 / The Ghost

The Pianist

And yet they did it again. The title spoils the plot completely and it doesn’ t even make me want to watch it. Come on, “The Pianist”: “oh jeah, I’ d love to see someone play a piano for 2 hours.. yahoow”.

No, seriously. This was bad, really really bad. Even my dead dog can do better than this.

The movie starts with – captain obvious – a man playing the piano. Next thing he knows, the Germans invade Poland and capture him and his family. Now he can’ t play his lovely piano anymore (how sad.. lol). He gets some kind of job at a bar where he can play at night, but that doesn’t take too long. The Germans try to kill him multiple times because he plays so bad. No it’ s even worse than bad, it’ s.. just awful.

Sad enough for the Germans, he is the only one who survives. Next thing he tries to hide, and plays the piano some more. Again the Germans try to kill him. But he survives yet again. At the end of the movie, he still plays his piano, and they don’ t want to kill him anymore for it. Strange movie. First he plays for the radio (so he must be good I guess). The following moment he plays so bad that they want to kill him for it, and at the end they want him on the radio again.

My alternate sequels:

  • The Pianist II
  • Pianodude: Revenge of the Germans
  • Schindler’ s Piano
  • Once upon a time in Poland
  • The Good, the Bad and the Pianist
  • No Country for the Pianist

“The Pianist” on IMDB. Rate: -5/10. Pianissimo.

PS: I have to admit one thing. This movie is oh so much better then Schindler’ s List: it’ s in color. 🙂


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